Not everyone works the same.
I am excited yet not? hahah
I don't know, I almost want to jump to the end of 2011 and see what happened.
You know when you run so much that you want to puke, i almost feel that way about Massage Therapy right now.
I feel so scare about it, I am not sure where I will end up going, I just want to keep on studying, I want to study everything and nothing. Yes I don't make any sense now, even I'm confused about myself sometimes.
Some days I wonder why am I studying it here, why couldn't I have just gone to BC or Ontario to do it, there are one of the most advance places; and the opportunities to upgrade are endless to be right now, especially in the east and west coast, somedays I feel like I am missing out on what I really want to learn. And of course there are days I feel like a city girl and the city is where I truly "belong" - somewhere chaotic and crazy. Just like my life.
But now I think about, at every turning point of my life of my suppose turning point, I always do something to change it.
I never made it to Sec 4, because I know i was leaving, so I did not study like I should. Imagined if I had stayed, I think I would have had to repeat Secondary 3 again.
In grade 12, the year I was supposedly suppose to graduation in 2009, I begged to stay one more year, because I did not have the credits and I was placed in the wrong grade cause my parents thought I was ready.
Now this again, some days I am not sure if I am sabotaging myself, I wish I know.
I have always believed that things happen for a reason; maybe in this case, is the chance to be ready for this world to prove myself for myself; even if it is not going to stop for me, I will make it stop in my own way so I will be ready for this. Ready for this in my own way.
I don't know, I almost want to jump to the end of 2011 and see what happened.
You know when you run so much that you want to puke, i almost feel that way about Massage Therapy right now.
I feel so scare about it, I am not sure where I will end up going, I just want to keep on studying, I want to study everything and nothing. Yes I don't make any sense now, even I'm confused about myself sometimes.
Some days I wonder why am I studying it here, why couldn't I have just gone to BC or Ontario to do it, there are one of the most advance places; and the opportunities to upgrade are endless to be right now, especially in the east and west coast, somedays I feel like I am missing out on what I really want to learn. And of course there are days I feel like a city girl and the city is where I truly "belong" - somewhere chaotic and crazy. Just like my life.
But now I think about, at every turning point of my life of my suppose turning point, I always do something to change it.
I never made it to Sec 4, because I know i was leaving, so I did not study like I should. Imagined if I had stayed, I think I would have had to repeat Secondary 3 again.
In grade 12, the year I was supposedly suppose to graduation in 2009, I begged to stay one more year, because I did not have the credits and I was placed in the wrong grade cause my parents thought I was ready.
Now this again, some days I am not sure if I am sabotaging myself, I wish I know.
I have always believed that things happen for a reason; maybe in this case, is the chance to be ready for this world to prove myself for myself; even if it is not going to stop for me, I will make it stop in my own way so I will be ready for this. Ready for this in my own way.